An exploration of the UK unpaid carer's world

 time is running faster than progress

Hello Alan,
As far as Pat & I are concerned we have promised to carry out the following actions :-
  • To pass suitable information to the Rotary Club of Ross-on-Wye for the members to see how they might be able to support the group using the various skills members have acquired through their professional careers.
  • To visit the group in Leominster to see how they arrange their business affairs with supporting evidence of their financial plans & the approaches they made in seeking funding.
  • To see what particular pieces of legislation they have had to adopt in order to comply with health & safety legislation, and safeguarding vulnerable adults.
  • To help put together a business plan that will show how all the relevant needs can be met, at what cost, at what can be raised locally & what will be required from outside funders.  It will be important that this clearly shows how funding will be affected when the work on the church site means a temporary alternative venue will be required.
  • To help in conversations with potential funders to ensure that clearly understand the needs for finance.
  • The plan will also need to ensure we have followed any specific requirements laid down by the Methodist Church as the owners of the building.
  • To help ensure that the requirements of the Charity Commission are met in full.
  • To meet with the group you establish to ensure that we clearly understand the aims & objectives of the group.
  • We will be away from November 26th for one week.
Neither of us can have a heavy on going week by week volunteers role due to our other commitments locally & regionally.
We hope this helps you understand how believe we can be of most help to you.
Best wishes & blessings,
Philip & Pat  
Sent: Friday, November 11, 2016 11:32 PM
Subject: Leaflet, Letter, and Compliment slip


Dear Anne and Philip

Leaflet and Compliment slip enclosed for comment.

Letter ditto - via


Silence is coldin'


Ross DMC stocktaking 7 Nov        Ross DMC - public Home page here    private Home page here 

                                                                                      Volunteers page here      all private pages are hidden

                                                                                      Your first time?   A quick overview is here.

Update 8 Nov 

  • Ross DMC Carer page here  has been shortened to give  ...

  • Carer stress here

1.17 updated


Hoping for a reply to the email.



The normal route to a new DMC is long and very involved. The main outcome is paid staff who don't need all these pages.  I present the situation on the basis of the readership having little knowledge of the unpaid carer-world and its huge dementia satellite.  If a topic is complicated, as much relevant info as possible is provided. Reference system v bullet-points is used to aid discussion and email referencing. Starting with the  Ross DMC - public Home page, work by others needs to aim for brevity.

Personal initials are used to maintain privacy.

AP would have received this if I knew her contact info and first-readers please send.

A sensitive issue is the proposed exclusion of DC. She has not received this due to her imminent holiday.  First readers are recommended to meet so that we can edit DC mention if she is to be aware of this page before her holiday. By the time she returns, she will be able to read a much updated version to include outcomes and to exclude DC mention in this context.

First-readers perhaps could decide to hold a 60-min meeting with AFH with the aim of better understanding of the project as presented on this page and editing it before onward transmission to anyone.  However, waiting until the end of the month when DC's to-do list includes higher priorities is not advised. Establish momentum.  Volunteer recruitment needs to start in earnest.

This page is NOT a satellite of the Ross DMC volunteers page here YET and it will take time and much revision before it is.

It says this: 


6 Nov

The Ross Mental Health Steering Group - MHSG - 
meets on Wednesday as people know from today's 
service sheet.  It presents a variety of project 
opportunities which I hope to make real in due course.

The text beginning with Members of Ross Mental 

Health Steering Group here gives one dimension 

of what needs to be done.

See comment below the _______   at the foot of this page.



Treading carefully, it was tempting to state the real situation    - one dimension of very little progress. However, the following fact is stated elsewhere.  Nobody is reading the Ross DMC pages.


I appreciate Christmas is on the horizon and the other seasonal excuse factors, but the project has no infrastructure. Without it, a business plan cannot emerge. It will be supported by the Ross DMC public webpages, as yet to demonstrate that Ross DMC has organisational structure. Aspects are listed on the left of this page.


The project lacks momentum.  New volunteers need inspiration.  Text and one graphic for the December Connections and A5 leaflets could be taken from here.  DC has been given similar text. That needs updating per the later version.  


Consideration is necessary re adding - - - The reader is reminded that dementia sufferers can be unpredictable.  If you are running an activity, have you had or are you willing to acquire the appropriate emergency training?  Are you confident that you can handle a reasonable range of emergencies. Will you contribute your knowledge, experience and feelings to the group?  Would you be willing to be trained in order to assume the role of dealing with all risk assessments? 


The verdict is anticipated to be no such text on the grounds of scaring people. That is why you will soon meet HVOSS. 

1    Lack of progress

  1. On 15 Oct, I wrote - - - My grateful relief at the arrival of the cavalry is shared with all (20!) volunteers and with Deborah for arranging the meeting.   Update 1 Nov - I misunderstood the context of the (20!) - four there on 28 Oct.  12 Nov - the cavalry has disappeared over the horizon.

  2. "there" = The Ross DMC set-up meeting here

  3. Since then, the project has gone downhill, as has my morale.  That needs contexting re my concomitant role as a carer. more

  4. I have commented to DC and AP recently that I can tell that nobody is reading these volunteer-based pages or the public pages here.

  5. The situation has not affected my output and many pages have been written since 28 Oct. Imagine a mouse in a microwave oven without heat.  It is in an endless rotation of vision-no-vision as it peers out to see people milling about, apparently not interested.  It carries on, hoping for the door to open. Hope just before 28 Oct soon faded. Four volunteers following the AGM appeal. Two were a foregone conclusion.  In effect - two new vols.   No distinct action or progress envisaged.

  6. DC has enough to do without this sort of comment and I hope someone else will be able to at least pass comment.  I have recently said to her and AP that nothing is happening. However, that was a tiny valve that had leaked. The main valve is not in danger but there is a massive amount bottled up.

  7. The Ross Mental Health Steering Group - MHSG - meets on Wednesday as people know from today's - 6 Nov - service sheet.  MHSG presents a variety of project opportunities which I hope to make real in due course.  

  8. The text beginning with Members of Ross Mental Health Steering Group here gives one dimension of the frustration.  see 6 Nov here

  9. The meeting at d) is asked to approve confirm application to join Dementia Action Alliance Herefordshire - DAAH and MRSG is likely to join.  Christ Church Council - CCC -  needs to consider formally declaring itself the  Ross DMC Advisory Board at some stage.  As Leader of Ross DMC, I can will make the DAAH application and will probably need to have CCC support in the form of PD's (male) - email address.  Update 8 Nov - scored text is the outcome of reflection.  There is no immediate public effect, and the process takes time. 

  11. There is text on various pages which says that the Ross DMC public pages will not be made public until the Set-up meeting on 28 Oct gives the OK.  There was insufficient time to deal with this topic.  However, the 1.15 item needed the pages. 
  13. The Home page carried a draft Welcome by DC who had been invited to send final text and a photo. As you see, I have dealt with it until she is able to deal with it.  

  14. A day in the life of Ross DMC  here carried the text in 26, 28 and 30 as lack of progress negates it.

  15. Carees and carers will have the opportunity early in December to meet the team and look around*

  16. The December meeting will collect members' initial requests and then take them through the practical interpretation of this website's contents.

  17. *TBC. This depends on Dr L who has talked about providing patients and carers but may take more time than within the hoped-for plan. more  12 Nov - 6 already welcomed by AFH.
  19. I hope he will have mustered enough patients so that a meeting can be held at Alton St Surgery in the first week of December.  It will include 28 but not 26.  Hope to hear something on 9 Nov.


2  Deputy Project Leader 

2.1 Role

  1. Christmas is always a good excuse for doing nothing but there should be a lot happening.  One important dimension is finding a Deputy Project Leader.  The logical person is AP as she has seen the Leominster DMC and is knowledgeable about dementia.  I am finding it very difficult to proceed as topic after topic without discussion is blocking the door to the public awareness of what this project is about, and determining the reality of the Ross DMC.

  2. Without a means to obtain opinion on what has been presented so far, I will present more and more on top of mountains of unread text.  There is a lot to be presented.  Anyone reacting to the extent of the reading to be done might reflect on this. The normal route to a new DMC is long and very involved. The main outcome is paid staff who don't need all these pages.  I present the situation on the basis of the readership having little knowledge of the care-world and its huge dementia satellite.  If a topic is complicated, as much relevant info as possible is provided. Reference system v bullet-points is used to aid discussion and email referencing

2.2  No delay

The Deputy Project Leader role needs to be occupied by someone very soon, even if pro-temp.  Others might share the role.  This is what needs to happen:

  1. An asap one-to-one session or a small-group meeting to look at the project in the absence of DC.  She cannot be expected to fit anything in before her break.
  3. Formulate a broad plan of action up to 1 March
  5.                              policy re MHSG on Wednesday - AP and AFH attending

  6. 3 will not be implemented but see 2.2.9 before DC contribution and approval.  However, the eggs-in-one-basket dimension of the project is a major weakness.  That includes my role as the person who is doing the donkey-work.  (A quote from the ill-fated press-release.)  However, I enjoy the role in principle but results of the output need to be evaluated and agreement reached on what arrives on any webpage

  7. However, 2.2.3 needs to include HVOSS which publishes updates in the Hereford Times.  I recommend that the meeting item 2.2.1 gives me the go-ahead to submit our volunteer needs in outline.  It will be presented to members beforehand.  Going back to j) and k), you have now met HVOSS.

2.3   Deputy Project Leader responsibility

  1. The DPL assumes responsibility for all aspects of the DMC operation in the event of AFH's absence on any day of operation and any longer-term disposition

  2. Early discussion with DC and AFH - AP?  Others?  First readers?

  3. A DPL early visit to A) the Leominster DMC or B) Droitwich DMC advised.  AFH is likely to be at A, and will accompany if B is chosen.

  4. The DPL is advised to become a Dementia Champion and to run a dementia talk for the rest of the team

  5. AFH recommends that he chairs the Front of House group

  6.                                    DPL chairs the Communication group      source - 21 - in left column here

2.4  External involvement?  Item 2.3.7

We now have a situation in which a woman connected to St Mary's may be involved in running a Dementia Friends session for the  Christ Church parish.  I have suggested to DC that the woman joins the Ross DMC project.

I have made provisional arrangements for one of our team to participate in a Dementia Champion day course. 


under construction


All our private pages are hidden pages = back-arrow use with shared public DIY DMC and other external pages. 



MHSG - meets on Wednesday 9 Nov.

Here is a confidential extract from the Minutes of the meeting held on 6TH OCTOBER 2016

Older People

  1. Alan Harrison reported to the group on the initiative originally from Holland where there are over 150 dementia meeting centres across the country. Locally there is a dementia meeting centre in Leominster which is proving to be successful and it was felt that further efforts should be made to develop such a service in Ross as well as looking more widely at making Ross a dementia friendly town.

  2. Deborah confirmed the support of her church to this initiative and the potential knock on effect to other churches and organisations across Ross. It is hoped that a dementia meeting centre will be open in Ross in January. There is still work to be done and this group confirmed its support to this initiative. 

  3. A dementia friendly town would certainly increase the attraction for some tourists which in turn would increase business in the town.

  4. Action: Phil to check the link in adult social care who helped to set up the service in Leominster and to make contact.

  5. Action: Alan and Deborah to write to the town Council for a grant application

Confidential comment
125 more like it.   "further efforts should be made to develop such a service in Ross" - is that aimed at the meeting or RDMC?

You can see that the meeting needs to be put straight.  I do not propose to focus any wider than "ensuring that local  people with dementia feel understood, valued and able to contribute to their community.". source italics added.    If visitors benefit, it is all to the good but they are not the DF town main objective.

DC told a story similar to  4.1  Creating Dementia Friendly Communities: Mary’s Isle of Wight story here.  Tourist use of local transport is a  small % of that by local yokels.

My comments appertaining to the business plan are relevant to this motion being too early.


pagetop  orig page   Ross DMC stocktaking here    this page here

                Ross DMC  volunteers here
                The Ross DMC set-up meeting here

                Ross DMC Home page here